Family

Life in North Georgia is very different than Volusia County. One noticeable difference is the number of foster families I have met. Fathers’s Day last week made me think, “What is family?” My version of family was the 1950’s Nelsons, Ozzie and Harriett, not my own family of Nelsons, although, my grandparents would have been similar in just about every aspect.

Today’s kids come from many different backgrounds. In the last week I met three different people, but they all share the same thing, they have given of themselves to raise other people’s kids. The first conversation was with a woman in her mid-30’s who has six children. Two of the six are biological and the other four were foster children, all adopted now. Yesterday I met a man who for the last seven months has been a foster parent to a five-year old boy and his eight-year-old sister, both born to a drug addicted woman and who will forever suffer issues tied to their start in life. Last, was a 50-year-old man whose daughter was murdered by a drunk driver two years ago; he has now adopted his grandson and is raising him. A far different vision of retirement than he expected to have. Even my own children have learned to deal with divorced parents and managing two distinct homes. They have a half-brother from my remarrying and step-siblings from their mother’s remarrying. Blended families bring issues, but yet we work through them.

Some kids are fortunate, or maybe not, to have a stable nuclear family. Others are thrust into circumstances we would not wish on anyone. We have an incredible society where unrelated people give of themselves to take care of other people’s children. We have a disgusting society where parents will choose to selfishly indulge themselves and neglect their own children. On Father’s Day I put my priority on my kids – the four people I would not trade for anything. In the following days I watched news reports with dismay as Tony Hayward of BP was criticized for taking several hours off to spend time with his son, but yet he had been discharged of his duties related to the Gulf four days earlier. Contradictorily, President Obama was given a pass to play golf, on Father’s Day, for many hours absent his children. Family is what we make of it, even under pressure we have to find time to support our children first.